Pacifiers, Co-Sleeping, and a Little Bit of Stubbornness

I would never....

During my pregnancy, I read everything I could get my hands on, developed strong opinions on how my son would be raised, and was resolute to stick to those opinions. Almost six months later, I can confidently say that I stuck to about 15% of that original plan. The only thing I've really held firm on is the no feeding Jellybean solid foods until 6 months, and definitely no rice cereal or oatmeal. The daycare keeps trying to push me to try rice cereal since his milk requirement keeps going up, but I'm adamantly refusing. I'll work my butt off to pump more milk rather than give him processed mush before his stomach is truly ready to handle it. It'll help baby sleep through the night longer? Well, I can sacrifice my sleep for his healthy dietary needs. 

Anyway, off my soapbox. The two other major things I was so sure I wouldn't do were pacifiers and co-sleeping. 

Pacifiers 

I've been blessed with naturally straight (although not perfect) teeth. Matthew on the other hand....not so much. Several thousand dollars and over a year later, he's on his last invisalign tray. The difference between us? He sucked his thumb, I didn't. That could be an old wives' tale, but the truth is in the smile. I didn't want Jellybean to have a pacifier for the crooked/buck teeth reason, and I just think it's ridiculous when I see toddlers running around with pacifiers in their mouths.

At eight weeks, his need to suck was STRONG. Nothing would console this kid except time on the breast. I didn't want him using me as a human pacifier, so I swallowed my pride and tried one of the pacifiers I got at the baby shower. He wasn't having any of that, so I went on Amazon and bought all the pacifiers I could find with good reviews. Soothie, Gumdrop, Avent... you name it I bought it. Desperate mama mode here. At the end of the day, the one that he preferred was the Soothie, the most *ridiculous* looking pacifier ever.  True to spoiling form, I bought a bunch of Soothies, to include the WabbaNub, a Soothie with a stuffed animal attached to the end. After all this, I could get Jellybean to take a pacifier about 20% of the time. He still preferred me! So, even though I had just spent a ton of money on pacifier accessories, I took it as a sign that I should have stuck to my guns and not have introduced the thing in the first place. 

After about a month at day care, Jellybean learned to take the bottle. We once again introduced the Soothie and he took it like a champ! My rule: only use the paci when we're out in public because I don't want him disturbing the peace. At home, he could cry his little lungs out and it wouldn't matter because I could deal with it.  Unfortunately, at about 15 weeks, Jellybean thought he'd best my efforts by discovering his THUMB. Since then, that thumb (his left one to be exact, hopefully he's be a lefty like his mama!) has been in his mouth 24/7. It's his soothing mechanism and one of the very best ways to calm him down when he's having a fit. At first, he'd get lucky when it came to getting his mouth and thumb to connect. His arms would flail about near his face and eventually, he'd make contact. As he developed better hand eye coordination, his ability to stick that left thumb whenever he wanted would get tons better. To my dismay of course. Perhaps it's hereditary? Dad sucked his thumb so naturally, Jellybean would too. Sucking reflex: 1 Mom: 0. 

My paci collection

And the winner is....the most ridiculous looking one! 

Jellybean loves his Elephant WabbaNub. 

His new best friend....his thumb. 

Co-Sleeping 

I know I'll get a lot of flak for this. We co-sleep. I read all about how it increases the SIDS risk, develops bad sleeping habits, etc. On the other hand, I've also read how it benefits the baby, how other cultures co-sleep for years, and how it solidifies that rich mother/baby bond. At first, I was adamant- NO CO SLEEPING. My youngest sister did it and she stayed in bed with my mom for YEARS.  On night 3 in the hospital, I sent Matt home to stay with Abby and to get a good night's rest. There was no reason for both of us to act like zombies. That also happened to be the night that Jellybean just would not sleep in his crib. So, I picked him up, laid him on my chest for some quality skin-to-skin time, and he was out like a light. It didn't take long til I was out. From then on, that's how we slept. My 7lb newborn slept on my chest. I know the red flags this raises, but it felt right and worked for our family. 

However......now that Jellybean is almost 6 months old and still sleeps in the bed even though he falls asleep on his own in a crib just fine....well I'll admit that's a result of my selfishness. Matt's still stationed up at D.C. and I'm just more comfortable having the little man in bed with me. We have a window A/C unit in the bedroom so we don't have to waste electricity cooling down the whole house at night, so I justify Jellybean sleeping in the bedroom with me because it's cooler. Even though I could just move the crib next to the bed. When we go to D.C., he sleeps in the bed because we don't have a crib up there. So, I further justify him sleeping in the bed with me because I don't want to change up his routine. These are all just excuses and I know it. With the temperatures cooling down, I see myself putting the little guy down in his crib in the next few weeks...maybe months....maybe never. 

I just couldn't put him down....

Sleeping with Mom just feels right. 

Quality bonding time with Mom and Dad. 

Just Go With The Flow 

In the end, I'm just going to do what feels right for my family. What works for some won't work for all. Jellybean will tell me what he wants and needs so, if we have to scale on what I was so sure would be my "Baby 101 Rules" then so be it. This kiddo seems to be doing just fine with his thumb and sleeping next to mama every night!